(...or why I don't photograph my children's birthdays.)
So, I'm not certain this is a shared experience... I just know that for me, when I've got a camera in my hand, I see things differently. I slip into what I call "photographer's mind", which exists somewhere just outside of this dimension. Once a camera hits my hand I become quantam entangled with the future, in print. Matte, not glossy...with blues in the shadows...don't forget the blues in the shadows...and sometimes a subtle haze from well placed lens flare. A modern vintage. Even thinking about a camera in my hand can cause me to slip into photographer's mind. And this is why I try to avoid photographing any event that I want to be otherwise present for; for example, my children's birthdays. I find that I just can't multitask photography with anything else. I've tried..and failed.. numerous times. I can photograph or I can do other things. I cannot photograph while doing other things. I just can't. It doesn't work for me.
But--t-t----ttt... since words have power and I am trying to consciously create my reality, perhaps I should reword that statement in a way that leaves space for all of the possibilities; "Currently, I can either photogrpah or do other things".
If I want to photograph, I give all of my attention to making images; if I want to attend an event, I give my attention to the event and to the crowd of folks with whom I am in attendance. It's a rare occasion where one is able to "have their cake and eat it too", but sometimes that knowledge isn't enough to stop me from grabbing a camera and a lens on my way out the door. And sometimes I am met with a beautiful success...but often times I find that I either misseed out on the meat and potatoes of the event or my images have clearly suffered.
I am ever striving to bring attention to all of my pursuits, with awareness comes choice and I am able to choose a different course of action. The more awareness we gain, the deeper our life- our art- and the deeper our connection to the beings, both human and non-human, that we share this beautiful rock with. What has your art taught you about yourself? Join the discussion in the comments below!